I lied, Yes You lied

To be a homosexual is honourable, a gift from God. It is who I am. God makes no mistakes. Knowing the truth as a gay christian  is liberating and gives me the most joy of my freedom.

But I lied, yes you lied…

I have paid the price for lying to be heterosexual. Pretending to be who you are will only harm you. EVERYONE was hurt, my father, mother, wife, son, my siblings, in-laws, friends and relatives etc.

But I lied, yes you lied.

I was FORCED to lie. I justified these lies with religion, culture, tradition and law.

But I lied, yes you lied.

To myself for all of my adolescence, I lied (yes you lied) to my family and friends. Because I didn’t know any better.

At the time it didn’t seem to matter

To my ex-wife because I was afraid of telling the truth.

I made those marriage vows in 1991, in the days of my youth.

But I lied, yes you lied.

In my prayers asking God to cure me of homosexuality instead of helping me to come to terms.

My religious belief and dogma nearly killed me. I wrongly married a woman and badly hurt everyone.

But I lied, yes you lied.

In my ministry I lied, (yes you lied) because I was deeply ashamed of who I was, it took my seven years to reconcile and give up the self stigma, denial and discrimination.

I suffered emotional and psychological breakdown and through it all I survived.

But I lied, yes you lied.

But I lied, yes you lied.

But I lied, yes you lied.

Through it all the healing begins. I declare that I am a Happy Holy Homosexual.

My holiness is connected to all things sexual.

I love the Lord God with all of my heart and soul.

Giving praise from my head to my feet and sole.

I rejoice in knowing who I am and whose I am.

No more lies, no insults, pain or harm

I am an example of God’s Pulchritude

At best I come with amazing attitude.

Though I lied, (yes you lied) the truth finally sets me free.

I have become the beacon of hope

Helping many others to cope

Thankful to God the Father, son and Holy Spirit, the magnificent three.

Jide Rebirth Macaulay is an LGBT rights activist. He’s the founder and CEO of House of Rainbow , London. He left Nigeria in the cause of his fight against homophobia and for the dignity of LGBT people. Jide Macauley now lives in London and has a British citizenship